That Refreshing Feeling of Being Hosed

So the doorway in my bedroom has not contained a door since I moved here and since it is right off the living room, privacy is a problem (well, do I really need to explain why a room needs a door?). So Yanni, the carpenter, installed two other doors in my house and told me to order a door for the bedroom and he would return to install it. The door arrived two months ago and Yanni has since had a meltdown. He accidentally swallowed some peroxide while gargling and now apparently he cannot even return phone calls, but can only drive around his block on his go-cart. My painter recommended a contractor who gave me an estimate: $60 per man per hour plus materials....he would not give me an idea how many hours it would be, but said it was a "small job" which I know, because I could not get anyone else to even come and look at it.

Well, they arrived at 8 and they are still here and the door is not yet up. They have had long discussions about millimeters ("I don't have a ruler that has millimeters on it") to ("Ma'am do you have a picture of the door from the catalogue?") This asked while the instruction booklet is right in front of them.

And the peeing. Oh my god. They have each been in the bathroom every half hour peeing like racehorses, they don't wash their hands, and at this point, I think one is in there and he didn't even close the door. I think they are drinking because there are a lot of trips to the truck and they come back with one thing. And I smelled one of them. Ugh.

I called my friend, J. who is on a hiatus before he starts his new job, and he heard the panic in my voice, said he would come over and give them "the hairy eyeball". When he got here, he said I had to let them finish because it would be impossible to get someone else to come.

Oops, I just heard the bossy one say, "I think we have it in backwards. You see the ribs on your side, fat and skinny. And I have skinny and fat" (Sigh) I hope they brought their pajamas.

I'm sure my hand will shake when I have to write this check. I should've hung a freakin' curtain for $17.95 and been done with it.